(Bad) Boku no Pico

Movie in one sentence:
Enjoy jail time, all who watched this.

Movie in more sentences:
Follow the life of a child with an unhealthy fascination for homosexual intercourse.

Oh God.

I guess this was going to happen someday. While this 3 episode series is obviously a hentai, more specifically a hentai that should be forbidden, the trolls of the internet already embraced this piece of trash with love and use the now infamous name "Boku no Pico" against newcomers to anime.
Now, I knew the gist of it before going into it, but like hearing about an unbelievably insane creepypasta, I looked it up anyway.

Perhaps I was hoping this boy to not really be a 10 year old.
Perhaps I was hoping it to not be a full blown hentai. Something that would make me say "Well, it's drenched in sin, but at least this one thing didn't happen, so it's not that bad". Because out of experience I know people like to overreact.
Of course this couldn't be one of those cases.

When I watched this series, it immediately reminded me of all those yaoi/slash fangirls at Deviantart and Tumblr. The kind that give me shit for speaking my mind about their fandom.
At the beginning of every episode you see a piece of text explaining that the creators don't support child intercourse and porn, and that the series is meant to be artistic, or some shit like that. And you know what, that's the same free-out-of-jail-card (literally) bullshit these fangirls use against me.
Just how fucking dare you. What artistic value does this series have? What's the art in a grown man jumping a little boy in his car? What's the art in three little boys, appearing gender-confused 90% of the time, circle-jerking it?
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you.

There was nothing sexy about this hentai. This hentai was pure, unfiltered failure. Opposed to being turned on, if that was even the point, I just turned angry with this stupid kid and his stupid faux-innocent expressions. Pico is the biggest enraging piece of shit I've ever seen in any anime. With his stupid, lame smirking at the end of every fucking episode, as if he's a fucking cute and corky character at the end of a fucking Looney Tunes episode. Bitch, I hope you fall off that bridge and die, you naked, disgusting male whore twat. Where the shit are his parents in all this? Why is he in a relationship with this pedofile in the first episode, but then he hangs out and corrupts this other kid in the next? I couldn't even watch the entire third episode after all this, it was fucking ridiculous. It was just an introduction to another character that looks, talks, acts and dresses like a girl, but is a boy, big surprise, fuck you.

The fucking "super kawaii" intro songs to these episodes are an even bigger joke. They truly are the shit nugget on this shit heap. Who are the fucking people that made this shit? Animation takes a long time to do; did none of these animators stop after a month and went "What the fuck are we doing with our time and money, let's not do this"? It takes a tremendously faul person to make three episodes starring a child with obvious mental issues. Pico should be slapped across the fucking face, get a buzz cut, and sent off to boot camp for the rest of his life.

SHIT.

(Average) Wolf Children

Movie in one sentence:
Follow the life of a woman who gets nothing but shit as a reward for her undying motivation and effort.

Movie in more sentences:
A young woman meets a werewolf and ends up having two children with him. When the man dies in an accident, she is left alone to take care of these small children who have the ability to transform.

I saw a scene from this movie float by at Facebook and was curious enough to check it out, which I just did today.

What to say that I didn't already say in my one-sentence description..
It was rather frustrating to see how this woman was so positive in life, while she had nothing to show for it, yet still claimed she did. In my opinion, anyway.
Both children were absolute assholes when they were little, and the boy in his later life turned, dare I say, into quite the entitled, lazy, little bitch.

The story of this movie looks great on paper; a girl meets a reserved man, they bond, he reveals to her he's a wolf, she doesn't care and they start living together, they have two children, the man tragically passes away, the woman does all she can to keep the secret of her children hidden and to keep them fed, the children grow up having different opinions about their nature and how they should live, etc, but all this only works if there's enough time spent on the relationships, and I don't think that's the case here. There was more time spent showing how the mother fixes the roof of her new house and tried to grow vegetables. The children only get one or two lines of dialogue explaining how they feel, and that's it. The rest of the movie is footage of sprinting wolves with human hairdos.

I just didn't know what to think of these people. The girl suddenly changes from being active to silent and the boy from being whiny to emo. There is logic behind it, but the movie rushes their transformation, so I can't empathize with the choices these characters make. The girl's distinct personality got erased as she got older and the boy became a different kind of annoying. Off-screen he found this old fox that teaches him how to be an animal, and the very moment this fox is confirmed to be dying, this 10 year old boy is all too eager to announce to his mother he's planning to be the new Lion King. Nature doesn't need a leader, kid, this isn't a Disney movie. Just be honest with her and say you don't give a damn about your family and the possible friends you could've made in the future. Because you're socially lazy and only attended school for a week, and base your opinion on human life on a week's experience.

At the end of the movie I just cared so little about these characters and I felt frustration for the mother who ended up being alone, without anyone telling her thanks. Except for her dead husband, of course, so you know she hallucinated that "thanks" for herself just to keep her cool in this shit life.
I didn't think this movie would turn me off like this, as it's clear it tried to tell multiple messages, all of them I can appreciate, but most events in this movie just felt bitter to me.
I don't know how else to explain it.
 

(Average) Fairy Tail

NOTE: Watched season 1 and part of season 2.

Series in one sentence:
A girl with the lamest magic powers ever gets accepted to the most reserved and talented magic club known in the country, without issues. Okey then.

Series in more sentences:
A young girl dreams of entering the most well-known magic guild, called Fairy Tail, and become a great wizard like them. She is quick to get accepted and embarks in many quests and adventures with her new friends at the guild.

I started watching this series because I remembered a friend praising it to me almost 6 years ago. He made it seem like it was pure brilliance, but I was less than impressed.

I'll be honest, it's been a while since I last saw it, but I really don't want to go back to it to check the facts. It started getting over-dramatic and boring quite fast, it didn't take long for me to stop caring about the series.

A thing I don't like about animes is those stories where the main character gets a bunch of "best friends ready to die for them" within the same second she meets them for the first time, and this anime was quick to push this girl in that situation.
Nevertheless, I did think that the characters had an awesome introduction. I dare say, all characters started out better when they..started out. For example, the dark-haired ice boy likes to fight with the pink-haired guy and often takes off his shirt. Especially when explained why he does that, it's funny. But eventually, both traits stop being a running gag and become more of an occasional easter egg.
And then there's the red-haired warrior maiden that didn't waste any words and everybody feared, but then all of the sudden she becomes casual with the two that were afraid of her just 2 episodes ago. All these years they were intimidated by her, but when this blonde girl gets into the mix, they are fine hanging out with her all of the sudden? It did not make sense to me.

The nail that sealed the coffin for me was when the main character's stupid overdramatic backstory entered the scene. The backstory itself wasn't that bad, even though I still don't know the details of it, but when the others started risking their lives for this girl they really don't have a decent connection with and she in response started sobbing for them, I had enough.
A bunch of strangers sobbing for a bunch of strangers does not get me involved in the story.

I would've liked the series better if the characters went on regular quests; but things escalated rapidly, and I don't think the characters know each other enough to be put in such situations. I found this to already be the case when they tried to save that village in the first season.
I just did not care.

(Average) My Little Monster

Series in one sentence:
Two mentally crippled people drag on an already short series by breaking up and falling back in love every episode.

Series in more sentences:
A loner girl, fully lacking emotion, ends up being the love interest of a boy with anger issues. Unfamiliar with the feelings he presents her, she is in battle with herself on whether or not she should accept him. He, on his turn, acknowledges her as the only light in his life and isn't able to let her go, though his uncertainty causes this to happen often.

I can appreciate characters who get to the point, but the episodes felt rushed because of the continuous changes of mental state these two were put in.

The speed in which the characters fell in and out of love with each other was ridiculous and became tiresome fast, and by the time the story knocked it off, the series already ended with the lamest conclusion ever. There are only 13 episodes, so I guess you're supposed to read the manga if you want to know the rest of the story, but based on what I saw, I can't say I care about seeing these two failure children together. Near the end I leaned more towards this blonde guy and the leading lady, but as intriguing as that romance was, very little screen time was given to it. It really was just a background thing.

My Little Monster's horrible writing isn't hard to miss, sadly, but it became even more apparent whenever its characters showed off their "Dr. Phil relationship analysation gift" and flawless knowledge on how others felt about their crush, but then acted oblivious the moment it concerned their own love life.

I wanted to accept this show as something deeper; a psychological story, a look in the minds of two socially restricted people, if you will. But it wasn't anything like that, as the series doesn't talk about these things in detail.
It felt like both main characters just went with the first emotion that crossed their minds whenever things went well or things went badly, which made for a messy story.